Archive for the ‘Divorce’ Category

Life can come at you hard — sometimes. The top stressors in life include death of a loved one, loss of home, loss of job, and divorce. Six years ago I started life over again when my marriage of 25 years suddenly ended. I fought hard to keep my home, my job, and my four kids from falling a part. I used these very simple 3 R’s to overcome my obstacles and succeed:

1. Read. Books, magazines, the internet — anything you can get your hands on — just read. Learning about the stress that you are dealing with and how others have survived can be encouraging. Tom Carder’s book, “Torn Asunder” put my problem into perspective giving me the courage to reinvent myself. Educating yourself and moving forward is the best thing you can do.

2. wRite. Get it out. Regurgitate all of your inner most thoughts and feelings in no logical sense. Notebook, journals, receipts, napkins — are all worthy products to write your feelings. I compiled all of my scribblings into my kid’s old Mickey Mouse folder and may write a great book one day. I also wrote my goals for my career to begin to stabilize my family.

3. Run. Or walk, bike, dance, or just get out and move — every day — for at least an hour. I never ran or had the desire to sweat until I felt alone six years ago. Feeling frumpy, I decided for a total make-over. My passion was fueled. I ran like a maniac and toned up and felt terrific. After three years, I was confident enough to initiate communication with another runner, a cancer survivor, who later became my new husband.

We ran together and built up to 5K’s. He was more passionate about the sport. He set his sight on a marathon. I’ll be his biggest cheerleader.

Life. It can hit you hard. But don’t let stress keep you down. Pick yourself up by your bootstraps and fight back.


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